


Stars and Satellites

by DSK1138



Series: Stars and Satellites [1]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers: Prime
Genre: Gentle Sex, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Minor Character Death, Miscarriage, Slow Burn, Sticky Sexual Interfacing, Tentacle Sex, clueless bots in love, discussions of pregnancy, feelings with a side of porn, knock out and starscream friendship, knock out plays matchmaker, starscream just wants to be loved okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2020-12-21 08:10:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21071705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DSK1138/pseuds/DSK1138
Summary: When Starscream offers to help Soundwave through his heat, he learns more about the third in command's past than he ever bargained for.





	1. Afflicted

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I've had this idea bouncing around in my head for a while, and have finally brought it to life. Soundwave/Starscream is super under appreciated imo, so I wanted to write a little something for them. It was intended to be a smut fic, but it ended up turning into something about coping with grief and loss as I got more interested in exploring their pasts. Never fear, though, there will be some smut as well ;) I also wanted to write some Starscream and KO friendship, so keep a look out for that as this story develops.
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

“Have you seen Soundwave around lately?”

Starscream’s optics narrowed. The question seemed innocent enough on the surface, but it was Knock Out’s tone of voice that immediately made him wary. Starscream humbly considered himself to be the reigning expert on ulterior motives, and right now Knock Out’s voice was  _ dripping _ with them.

“No,” he snapped. “Why do you ask?”

“Oh, no reason,” said Knock Out, casually rubbing some invisible speck of dirt from his immaculate chassis. “I just needed to speak with him about some medical check ups he’s due for.”

Starscream rolled his optics. “Is this something I should be concerned about?”

It had been a slagging awful past few weeks. Megatron was gone on some pointless crusade until Primus-knows-when, leaving Starscream to guide an army of incompetant fools. They’d already lost two Energon mines to the Autobots, and if Starscream didn’t know better he would almost suspect their leader of setting him up to fail on purpose, just to return at exactly the right moment and deal out what would no doubt be a very excruciating and unpleasant punishment. 

He had enough problems to deal with without now having to worry about the Decepticon third in command potentially falling ill.

In all honesty, he hadn’t even noticed Soundwave’s absence from the bridge. The intelligence officer was rather good at not making his presence noticed, and Starscream had been too caught up in his own frustrations to worry about what Soundwave was doing. Soundwave competently carried out any tasks assigned to him and didn’t try to undermine Starscream’s leadership, and that’s all he really cared about.

That being said, it would certainly be a cause for concern if something were to happen to Soundwave. Not only was he essential to keeping the Decepticon cause operating functionally, it would also make Starscream look even worse if Megatron returned to find his third in command disabled from some preventable illness.

Knock Out’s tone was too casual for this to be the case, however, which put Starscream slightly more at ease.

“Oh, no, nothing serious,” said the red mech. “Just some basic maintenance.” His optics glowed with some forbidden knowledge, daring Starscream to keep pressing.

Despite his better instincts, the Seeker took the bait.

“If it’s not important, then why did you come all the way up to the bridge and ask me about it instead of handling it yourself?”

“Well, I really don’t think I should be sharing confidential information about my patients,” Knock Out replied, looking for all the world like a sparkling with an ill-kept secret.

“Spit it out already! Need I remind you that as the current commander of this ship, any sort of ‘confidential’ information regarding those on board is  _ very much _ my business,” Starscream growled, wings twitching with impatience.

“If you insist.” Knock Out shrugged, a tiny smirk gracing his features. “Soundwave is going into heat.”

“What?” sputtered Starscream, optics wide. This was unexpected.

To his knowledge, no one on the  _ Nemesis _ had experienced a heat cycle in centuries. The Decepticon medics had found ways to modify a bot’s coding to prevent such cycles from happening. It was too distracting during a war and could put a much-needed soldier out of commission for up to a week, not to mention the possibility of sparklings. Despite the dwindling numbers of what was left of Cybertron’s population, neither side was cruel enough (or stupid enough) to bring newsparks into the middle of a war.

“How did this happen?” he demanded.

“Soundwave has a glitch in his coding that prevents me from being able to fully modify it to prevent heats,” Knock out said. “I can give him suppressants for it but sooner or later it eventually happens regardless. Of course, it doesn’t help that he’s been rather occupied as of late trying to keep things on this ship from completely falling apart.” He tossed a not-so-subtle side glance at Starscream.

“Are you implying that this is somehow my fault?” growled Starscream.

Knock Out grinned. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about this sooner?”

“I did,” said Knock Out. “Or at least I tried to, but I distinctly remember you saying something about not bothering you with matters that don’t involve lost energon mines and how to win them back.”

Starscream growled in frustration. This was just  _ great _ . His chief intelligence officer was going into heat at a time when his help was crucial, and worse, Starscream hadn’t even noticed. In his defense, it’s not like Soundwave made a particular effort to assert his presence. He was a mech who preferred to stick to the shadows, so to speak, but he did his job competently and was dependable, so Starscream had never had reason to complain.

He turned on his comm. “Soundwave! Report to the bridge immediately.”

“I don’t think that’s wise,” Knock Out advised. “I don’t know how far along he is and if he’s already fallen into heat, every bot on this ship is going to be fighting over him.”

Knock Out had a point, Starscream realized, and amended his earlier order.

“Are you in your quarters?” Starscream asked over the comm, which had remained silent.

“......Affirmative,” a voice finally spoke.

“Wait there. Knock Out needs to speak with you. As do I,” he added.

Knock Out cocked an eyebrow at him, which the Seeker promptly ignored.

Thankfully, the red mech kept the sassing to a minimum as the two of them made their way to Soundwave’s quarters. As… irritating as Knock Out could sometimes be, when it came to medical concerns he was all business, a trait that Starscream begrudgingly appreciated.

They arrived outside Soundwave’s quarters, and Starscream knocked impatiently but received no answer.

“Soundwave!” he barked. “Open the door!”

Finally, he heard movement from inside the habsuite, and the door slid open. Soundwave was standing there, blocking the doorway, his body language tense.

Almost immediately Starscream was hit by a wave from the third in command’s EM field and had to physically restrain himself from moving closer. It was… strong. Slag. He’d forgotten heat coding could give off signals this strong, and even so, it was clear that Soundwave was attempting to repress it. He could only imagine what the coding must be like unrestrained.

Thankfully, Knock Out seemed to be unaffected by it. Starscream had heard that bonded mechs were unaffected by heat coding of those other than their mate, but he hadn’t known whether that was true until now.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going into heat?” Starscream demanded.

Soundwave answered with archived audio from Knock Out, who looked a little off-put to hear his voice coming from the other mech’s speakers. “-not your concern.”

“As the current commander of this ship, everything that goes on here is my business,” he retorted. “You will do well to remember that in the future. How long is this going to last?” he asked, turning to Knock Out, who had just completed a quick scan of the intelligence officer.

“The heat coding has already taken too strong of a hold,” he said. “There’s nothing we can do to stop it now. It should be over in one to two weeks, give or take.” He flashed a sympathetic look at Soundwave, who remained as unreadable as ever.

“ _ Wonderful _ ,” groaned Starscream. How were they going to get anything done now with one of their most valuable assets out of commission?

He sighed. “You are to remain in your quarters until this is over. A mech in heat will provoke the Vehicons, and I will not have fights breaking out on my ship. Understood?”

Soundwave nodded wordlessly.

“Good,” said Starscream. “I expect you to resume all duties as soon as this is over.” After a short pause, he added, “Comm me if you need anything.”

Maybe deep down he knew he was being harsh. It was not as if Soundwave had asked for this to happen either.

“Do you need anything else here?” he asked Knock Out.

“No, I’ve done all I can,” the doctor replied. “Sorry Sounders,” he added sympathetically.

If Soundwave was annoyed by the nickname, he gave no visible response, and shut the door to his habsuite without a word.

~

“Can I help you?” Knock Out finally asked.

Starscream had been pacing in the medbay for the past half hour, his wings twitching with increasing frustration.

“Are you  _ sure _ there’s nothing you can do about Soundwave?” he said, pausing to absentmindedly scrape a claw over some stray medical equipment.

“I’ve already told you,” said Knock Out, sounding uncharacteristically apologetic. “He just needs to ride it out.”

Starscream sighed dramatically, draping himself over a countertop with a huff. For a mech whose absence he admittedly hadn’t noticed before, Soundwave had suddenly found a way to occupy all of Starscream’s thoughts. Only a day had passed since all of this started, but it felt like an eternity. His processor had played out all sorts of scenarios that could happen in the third in command’s absence.

“Of course, there is one option, but it might be a bit… inappropriate for me to suggest,” said Knock Out.

Starscream glared up at him. “What?”

He immediately regretted this question when he saw the smug look that crossed Knock Out’s face. “You could always help him  _ take care _ of things, so to speak. It speeds up the process, you know.” He added quickly, “I don’t mean  _ you  _ specifically, of course. I’m sure there’s someone on board who would happily volunteer.”

That was a slagging lie. Judging by the smug look on his face, Knock Out had obviously meant Starscream. “Out of the question!” he snarled.

“It was only a suggestion,” said Knock Out, trying and failing to hide his devious smile.

“I’m already lacking one officer. I don’t need to lose the duties of any other mechs on board and  _ I  _ certainly don’t have the spare time to waste on...” he waved a servo dramatically, letting Knock Out fill in the blank.

“Well, that never stopped Megatron,” Knock Out muttered, optics filled with glee as he waited for Starscream’s reaction.

“ _ What?! _ ” Starscream hissed, his processor reeling in shock. “You’re lying. H-how would you even know that?”

“Soundwave’s not the only one who’s good at learning secrets about his comrades.”

“Th- That’s. I-” The Seeker was lost for words. Sure, he knew that Megatron and Soundwave had always been close, but he had never imagined that closeness would extend to the two of them sharing a berth. Not that the thought of Megatron in a berth was one that crossed his mind often, despite what certain gossipy mechs on the  _ Nemesis  _ might insist. In all honesty, he had assumed that the Decepticon leader had remained celibate, either by choice or necessity, as had most of the commanding officers in the Decepticon army, Starscream included. Sure, casual fragging was common among the lower ranks, and some few had even formed conjunx endura bonds, such as Knock Out and Breakdown. However, most bots just didn’t have the time or energy to focus on that sort of thing during a war.

“Really, Starscream, I would have thought you more observant than that,” continued Knock Out.

“This may come as a shock to you, but  _ some  _ of us have real work to do instead of chasing pointless gossip,” the Seeker retorted, trying to hide his obvious discomfort.

Knock Out chuckled. “Perhaps you should learn to multitask, commander.” He added a devious wink before continuing, a little more serious this time. “Listen, all I’m saying is if you want Soundwave up and operational as soon as possible, this is your option. Take it or leave it.”

“I’m through with this conversation,” Starscream growled, and stormed out of the medbay.

~

The only sound on board the bridge of the  _ Nemesis  _ was the click of Starscream’s heels as he paced back and forth like a caged turbotiger. The Vehicons seemed to sense that he was in a bad mood, and wisely kept quiet as they went about their work.

He knew he should be working too, but he couldn’t get the image out of his processor.  _ Soundwave and Megatron _ . Not that he cared what they did in their spare time, of course. He did feel some embarrassment, however, that this could have been going on without him even noticing. Likely it had been infrequent, he told himself. Just a way to help Soundwave through his heats. But a different thought nipped at the back of his processor.  _ What if it wasn’t? _

He couldn’t place why that bothered him so much, and he didn’t want to take the time to figure it out.

_ Perhaps that’s why Soundwave is so obnoxiously loyal to Megatron _ he thought snidely.

Finally, his pacing stilled as he came to a stop in front of a computer.  _ Might as well try and accomplish  _ something  _ today. _

“Soundwave, forward me the report on-”  _ Oh. Right. _

He groaned in frustration.  _ Slag this. _

“I have some matters to attend to,” he barked to one of the higher-ranking Vehicons. “Make sure everything remains operational in my absence and comm me if anything happens.” The Vehicon nodded, and Starscream rushed out of the bridge.

~

In a few short minutes, he found himself standing in front of the door to Soundwave’s habsuite, his processor at war with itself. Rationally, he told himself, it was important to get Soundwave back to work as soon as possible. That’s all this was. However, a deeper part of him knew there was more to it than that. Something within him delighted at the idea of taking what Megatron had claimed as his.  _ You think you’re so excellent. Well, just wait. I’ll lead this ship better than you ever could  _ and  _ I’ll give your third in command the single most satisfying heat he’s ever experienced.  _

His mind made up, he pinged Soundwave. “Soundwave, I need to speak with you. Open your door.”

He could feel the other mech’s hesitance. “It’s a matter of utmost importance,” Starscream added. Finally, the door slid open and Starscream stepped inside, closing it carefully behind him.

The habsuite was dim, and it took some time for his optics to adjust before he could make out the intelligence officer sitting at the edge of the berth. For a mech in heat, Soundwave looked remarkably well put together. There was no indication of any kind of… activity, and Starscream wondered briefly if the other mech had just been sitting there on his berth for the past cycle.

Then, without warning, Soundwave’s field hit him. He could sense the other mech putting forth every effort to restrain it, but despite his best attempts, Soundwave couldn’t hide his arousal completely. Despite this, Starscream marveled at the intelligence officer’s utter control over his base protocols. He could feel the other’s arousal, his desperate desire to interface, and yet Soundwave acted as dignified and in control as ever.

“Soundwave, I-” he didn’t know quite how to word his proposal, and the lust quickly working its way into his processor was making it difficult to think. All he could think of was Soundwave, how good the intelligence officer would look squirming beneath him, how Starscream longed to make him lose that careful control and submit to his basic instincts.

He shook his helm to clear these thoughts. “I have been informed that interfacing with another bot shortens the duration of the heat rather significantly. I-” Slag, why was this so difficult? “It is of grave importance that you return to work as quickly as possible, and therefore I am willing to offer my services as an interface partner, if you so desire.” Soundwave stared at him wordlessly, which did nothing to ease Starscream’s apprehension. Still, he continued, “This would be a one time arrangement. I will not pressure you to do anything against your will. If you would prefer a different interface partner, that can be arranged. If you prefer not to interface and to take care of this yourself, your choice will be respected.” He hoped that Soundwave wouldn’t choose the latter, but even so, he would honor the other mech’s freedom to choose when and with whom he interfaced.

Soundwave remained silent for an uncomfortably long time. Though he couldn’t see the other mech’s features, Starscream got the sense that beneath the visor Soundwave was appraising him. He could almost feel the hidden optics roaming over his frame.

Finally, after what seemed like eons, Soundwave spoke. “Proposal: accepted. Preferred course of action: interface with Starscream.”

Starscream tightened his intake, a bit surprised despite himself, but his surprise was soon replaced by pure, unrestrained lust. Well, no going back now.


	2. Addicted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahead, folks

In truth, Starscream couldn’t even remember the last time he had interfaced with anyone. Sure, he’d gotten around a bit in his younger days, and he and his trinemates had shared a berth fairly often at the start of the war. However, as his ambitions grew, his interest in interfacing dwindled. His inadvertent celibacy was practically cemented when he and his trinemates ended up going separate ways later on in the war.

So he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t just slightly intimidated by the prospect of berthing with Soundwave.

Tentatively, he moved towards the other mech, who was still seated perfectly still on the berth. It was only then that he noticed Laserbeak was missing from her usual perch on Soundwave’s chest.  _ At least we won't have an audience. _

Another wave of lust washed over him as he came into closer contact with Soundwave’s field. Some of his anticipation from before vanished and he leaned forward, placing an exploratory nibble to the other mech’s neck cables.

It was only then that he noticed Soundwave was trembling. The effort of restraining his heat coding had apparently taken more of a toll than he’d initially let on. This knowledge filled Starscream with a swell of confidence. “Relax,” he purred into the other mech’s audial, before continuing his exploration of Soundwave’s neck, gauging carefully to see which bites would elicit the strongest reaction.

His efforts seemed to be paying off as the intelligence officer’s fans clicked on with a loud whirr. Starscream placed his servos lightly on the other mech’s chest, and with a gentleness that surprised even himself, slowly guided him down onto the berth.

He ran a single talon slowly down Soundwave’s chassis, his touch light. He didn’t know if it was the heat coding or if Soundwave was just exceptionally sensitive to physical stimuli, but the other mech began to write and squirm beneath him as Starscream dipped his finger into sensitive seems. It was intoxicating, watching Soundwave lose control, and Starscream was so caught up in watching him come undone that he was startled by a soft, yet insistent tug to one of his wings. At some point, Soundwave had released his tentacles, and now the appendages weaved loosely in the air around Starscream, gently pulling him closer.

The message was clear, and in answer Starscream placed his servos on Soundwave’s thighs and firmly pushed them apart.

It occurred to Starscream that Soundwave was surprisingly attractive like this, his lean, powerful frame spread wide and completely at the Seeker’s mercy. He wondered what Soundwave’s face must look like beneath his visor. It was not the first time he had speculated about it, but this time he imagined it being a handsome face. He briefly entertained the thought of ordering Soundwave to remove the visor, but decided against it. It seemed like a breach of the other mech’s privacy, and some secret part of him admitted the air of mystery only served to make Soundwave even more attractive.

He felt a heat building in his array, and without wasting more time, leaned forward and ran his glossa along the seams of Soundwave’s still-closed panel. It only took a few well-placed licks for the panel to retract, displaying a valve already slick with fluids. Starscream smirked and plunged two fingers deep inside. “That eager, are we?”

Internally, he cringed a bit at the cheesiness of his own comment, but he couldn’t help himself. How many bots could say they had gotten the chance to see Soundwave dripping wet and practically begging to be spiked? Surely Starscream could indulge in just a little bit of gloating.

Soundwave’s valve clamped down on the fingers inside him, which slid deeper without any resistance.  _ Primus, he’s wet _ .

Soundwave ground his hips in frustration as Starscream pulled the fingers back out. They were soaked with lubricants, but that didn’t stop Starscream from drawing them into his mouth and slurping the fluids off of them, looking Soundwave directly in the visor as he did so.

Soundwave was already bucking his hips earnestly, trying to rub against Starscream’s closed panel. In another circumstance, Starscream would have loved to draw things out, make the ever-quiet mech break his silence and  _ beg _ . However, he was here for strictly professional reasons, he reminded himself. There was no time to delay things even further.

Finally, Starscream’s panel retracted, and his spike immediately sprang free from its housing. Before he could line up and push it in, however, one last thought crossed his mind.

“You did have Knock Out install preventative measures against being sparked, right?” he asked cautiously. “I have no wish to become a sire.” He grimaced as an image graced his processor of little winged gremlins running about the  _ Nemesis _ and clinging to his frame. And he didn’t even want to  _ begin _ to think of what Megatron would say.

Soundwave’s voice sounded strained as he answered. “Becoming sparked: not a possibility.”

Had he been thinking more clearly, Starscream might have questioned the odd wording of this response, but instead he simply nodded his acknowledgement, allowing himself to be pulled completely into the orbit of Soundwave’s lust.

This time there was no hesitation as he lined up and pushed his spike up, up, right into Soundwave’s slick valve. He was met with no resistance, and in fact, the other mech’s valve was so slick with fluids that he almost slid right out again. “Ah!” He gasped. “Slag!” He rested a hand on Soundwave’s chassis to steady himself, and felt the other mech’s rapid intakes beneath him.

He rocked his hips, and Soundwave’s intake stuttered. Starscream grinned, rocking his hips again and thrusting even deeper this time. Soundwave’s servos, which remained at his side, clutched at the berth beneath him. Knowing he had the other mech right where he wanted him, Starscream began to set a pace, thrusting earnestly. With each thrust, lubricant squelched around his spike, which only served to fuel the charge that was rapidly building between the two of them.

It didn’t take long for Soundwave to overload. He somehow remained as silent as ever, even as his frame bucked with immense pleasure. His legs kicked out, one narrowly missing Starscream’s helm. The Seeker snarled and pushed the other’s legs back down to the berth with a firm shove, holding them there as he continued to thrust.

He could feel his own overload building, and when Soundwave’s valve clamped down around him, willing him to push deeper, it finally sent him over. He gave one last powerful thrust, crying out in a low moan as transfluid shot from his spike and filled Soundwave’s valve, mingling with the copious amounts of fluids already present.

The sudden influx of fluids caused Soundwave to overload again, but this time Stasrcream was too spent to restrain him as his legs kicked against the berth. Finally, Soundwave stilled, and Starscream collapsed forward onto him, panting. Slowly, he pulled out, watching with satisfaction as fluid ran freely from Soundwave’s exposed valve.

Soundwave followed Starscream's gaze to his own valve. The sight of their fluids mingled together only seemed to turn him on even further, much to Starscream’s amazement. He should have known that a mech in heat would not be satisfied that easily.

“All right,” he panted, “If it’s more you want, I can give you a lot more where that came from.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my first time writing smut. I hope I did okay! Next up, be prepared for some feels.


	3. Wait and Bleed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Starscream gets some shocking news, but not everything is what it seems. Be prepared for feels.

“So? How was it?”

He was turned away from the other mech but Starscream could still hear the smirk in Knock Out’s voice.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said, optics rigidly trained on the data screen in front of him.

“Not the type to interface and tell, huh? Pity,” Knock Out sighed dramatically. “And after all the trouble I went to setting you two up. One would think you’d show at least a little appreciation.”

At this, Starscream finally whirled around to face him. “This was not your doing. In fact, it did not have anything at all to do with you,” he snarled. “It was simply an officer doing his job and helping another officer.” He paused. “And if you  _ must _ know, I fulfilled my duty quite  _ thoroughly _ . Even Megatron himself cannot dream of being as  _ effective  _ at looking after his officers.”

Okay, so maybe it was a bit petty of him to have given in to the other mech’s goading so easily, but Starscream tried not to let his embarrassment show.

Knock Out laughed. “Soundwave certainly seems to agree. He’s been in an unusually good mood lately.”

Starscream raised a brow, before turning to steal a glance at Soundwave, who stood on the other side of the command center, deeply ingrained in whatever it was he was doing.

Truthfully, it had always been difficult for him to determine what kind of mood Soundwave was in, and even after nearly a full two solar cycles sharing a berth, the other mech remained just as enigmatic as ever.

“As long as he is efficient in his work,” Starscream grumbled, turning back to face Knock Out.

And Soundwave  _ had  _ been efficient the past few cycles. In fact, everything on board the  _ Nemesis  _ had been going unusually well. Starscream didn’t consider himself to be particularly superstitious, but he couldn’t help seeing this as some sort of sign of things to come.

_ Yes, things are finally going my way. I’ll show Megatron exactly how to do things  _ properly.  _ By the time that old slag-eater comes back from wherever in the Pit he’s gone off to, his troops will have already pledged their unending loyalty to me. _

He turned to steal another glance at Soundwave, and nearly jumped when he noticed the other mech’s visor staring right at him. Soundwave turned away quickly, and Starscream mirrored the movement, trying to ignore the energon rising to his cheeks. He could hardly look at Soundwave now without picturing the mech in all sorts of lewd positions, his valve tight around Starscream's spike.

He shook his helm, trying to clear the raunchy images from his processor. He had an army to run, and no time to worry about some one-night stand.  _ Things with Soundwave will go back to normal soon enough _ .  _ In a few cycles we’ll have forgotten all of this ever happened. _

~

Any return to normalcy, however, was disrupted a few days later, when Soundwave disappeared yet again.

This time, Starscream noticed his absence right away. And no, it did not have anything to do with Soundwave being constantly on his processor. Starscream was simply learning to keep better track of his officers. Yes, that was it.

Somehow, he found himself in the medbay.

“Knock Out,” he said, having to half-shout so that the other mech could hear him over the noise of the buffer Breakdown was currently pressing to his frame. “Where is Soundwave? He’s not answering his comm.”

Breakdown switched off the buffer and gave his conjunx a quick peck on the cheek, murmuring something into his audial before trodding off.

Starscream’s optics followed him as he left. He’d never quite understood those two.

“Ah, yes. Soundwave is on a short leave of absence, medical related. It’s nothing serious. He’ll be back to work shortly,” Knock Out answered, admiring his reflection in a nearby surface. “Breakdown really did do a stellar job,” he said to himself.

“Can you focus?” Starscream hissed. “What, exactly, is wrong with Soundwave?”

Knock Out paused, finally looking up from his reflection.

“It… might be better if you ask him yourself.”

Starscream raised a brow, confused. Knock Out could often be coy, especially regarding this whole heat situation, but this time, his hesitance seemed to be genuine. This was something he clearly felt he was not at liberty to tell.

Nevertheless, Starscream pressed on.

“Do I need to remind you yet again that I am your commanding officer? Nothing on this ship stays hidden from me, so whatever it is you know, I suggest you  _ spit it out _ .”

Knock Out looked nervous, but upon an insistent glare from Starscream, finally gave in to the orders.

“Soundwave is sparked.”

“WHAT?!”

“Wait, it’s not what you think!”

Starscream didn’t hear him. He was already shaking with fury, confusion, and a slight panic.

“He told me it wasn’t possible! He had better have a  _ slagging good _ explanation for this.”

“Starscream, wait!” Knock Out grabbed his arm to get his attention. “The situation is more… complicated than it seems. You really should go talk to Soundwave about it.”

“Oh, I will. Soundwave and I are going to have a very serious little chat. And if he doesn’t explain himself adequately, you and he  _ both  _ are going to regret ever emerging from the Allspark,” Starscream hissed, yanking his arm away.

He passed Breakdown in the hallway as he stormed out. “Out of my way!” He snapped. Had Breakdown been listening in on the conversation?  _ Wonderful. Why not just announce to everyone on the ship that I got Soundwave sparked? _

He would deal with Knock Out and Breakdown later. For now, he was on a warpath directly to Soundwave’s quarters.

After Starscream was out of sight, Breakdown slipped back in to the medbay.

“Do you really think this whole matchmaker thing is a good idea?” He asked.

“Sure. What’s the worst that could happen?” Knock Out replied optimistically. He seemed to contemplate something. “They could both use the companionship. They just don’t realize it yet.”

“You are the single nosiest mech I’ve ever met,” Breakdown sighed.

“You know you love me for it,” Knock Out said teasingly.

Breakdown smiled warmly, wrapping him in an embrace from behind. “You got me there.”

~

Starscream banged on the door of Soundwave’s quarters.

“Soundwave! Open this door right now!”

There was no answer. Starscream growled. He could feel a faint reading from Soundwave’s EM field. He  _ knew _ the other mech was in there.

“As your commanding officer, I  _ order _ you to open this door immediately!”

Finally, the door slid open and Starscream stepped into the habsuite. He was surprised to find it completely dark.

“You had better have a  _ very _ good explanation-” he was cut off, however, when he saw Soundwave sitting on the berth.

Even though Soundwave remained more or less a mystery to him, it didn’t take an expert to see that something was very wrong.

Just from the other mech’s body language alone- Starscream couldn’t remember ever seeing Soundwave look so… weak.

The third in command sat slumped, staring seemingly at nothing. It was hard to tell, as his visor displayed nothing but static.

Beyond his appearance, something was very wrong with his field. He kept it pulled tight, but Starscream could still pick up traces of … sorrow? Regret? Was that what these feelings were?

His anger cooled just slightly, and he moved to stand in front of Soundwave.

“Knock Out told me you’re sparked. Care to explain?”

It was a rhetorical question, of course. Starscream did not intend on leaving until he had an explanation.

“Conditions: not sustainable for carrying to term. Will not result in sparkling.”

Soundwave was still keeping his field as restrained as he could, but Starscream could pick up enough of it to gather that he was telling the truth.

“I’m going to need a bit of a better explanation than that,” he said. He was still angry at being lied to, but more concerned now than anything. He had never seen Soundwave this shaken.

Soundwave was silent. He was clearly hesitant to talk about it, but Starscream pressed on, trying a different tactic this time than his demands from earlier.

“Normally, I’m content to leave well enough alone. You are a competent officer who does his job well, and I’m happy to leave you to your own devices. However, when you agreed to interface with me, you made this my business. I deserve to know what is going on.” He paused, his pride preventing him from getting out the next part, but finally, he managed. “Please.”

Soundwave dipped his head, relenting.

“In the arena: physical modifications required for gladiators. One of these modifications: removal of gestational tank.”

Starscream cocked his head in surprise. He never knew that…

Soundwave continued. “Sparklings: deemed too much of a distractoin. Being sparked: renders gladiator unable to fight while carrying. Gladiator unable to fight: loss of profit for masters. Therefore, removal of gestational tank: best course of action.”

Starscream was quiet for a moment. He had been aware, more or less, that the gladiators lived under harsh conditions. Megatron himself had made it a talking point in many of his speeches, bemoaning the way that the gladiators had to struggle just to survive, all for the entertainment of the wealthy elite. However, Starscream had never imagined that the conditions in the arena included modification of their very frames.

“So… how are you sparked, then?” He finally asked.

“Newspark: begins in the carrier’s own spark. Then, the gestational chamber. Soundwave: carrying newspark in his own spark. When newspark attempts to enter gestational chamber: nowhere to go. Survival: not possible.”

Starscream understood now. It truly wasn’t possible for Soundwave to carry, but that didn’t mean that he still couldn’t get sparked. He wondered if this had happened before. Though he himself had no interest in reproducing, Starscream could still imagine how painful it would be, to feel the presence of another spark in your very own, only to feel it fizzle out, powerless to do anything to help it.

“Did you want to become a carrier someday?” he asked softly.

Soundwave was quiet for a long time, before he replied, his voice so quiet Starscream had to strain to hear it. “Affirmative.”

Starscream looked away, his tanks churning with sorrow for the other mech. Though the war made it unlikely that Soundwave would have been able to become a carrier anyways, he still deserved to have that choice, and it had been cruelly taken away from him.

They were both quiet for a few minutes, before Starscream spoke again. “Can I see it?”

Soundwave seemed surprised by this. He was still a few moments, then, slowly, his chest cavity slid open with a  _ click _ . 

Starscream tried to keep his field as gentle as possible. Showing another mech your spark was extremely intimate, and he didn’t want to take for granted that Soundwave had chosen to open his spark chamber for him. Tentatively, he moved closer, so he could get a better look.

Soundwave’s spark glowed a bright blue, lighting up the room around them. It was … rather beautiful. It took Starscream a moment to find the second light, which was much smaller. It flickered desperately, already fading. It wouldn’t be long before it was completely gone.

Starscream studied the two sparks silently for a while, lost in thought. Now that he was up close, he realized that Soundwave was shaking.

Before he could think twice about it, Starscream moved to sit on the berth next to Soundwave. Slowly, cautiously, he placed a servo on the other mech’s back, and began rubbing circles in what he hoped was a soothing manner.

They sat there together wordlessly for a very long time, until the second spark finally faded completely. Soundwave closed his chest compartment. He was still obviously upset, but seemed a bit more relaxed than before.

Finally, Starscream decided to take his leave and give the other mech a bit of privacy.

“Take the time you need,” he said as he paused in the doorway. “And comm me if you need anything.” And with that, he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I'm doing okay writing these two! Thanks for all of the kind comments so far <3 Coming up next: more feels, some flirting, and eventually, more smut.


	4. Surrender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Be prepared for some more angst. This time it's Starscream's turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my mood music while writing this chapter, if anyone is interested: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JcEuRT7rrP4

Things were different, after that.

Starscream was expecting the awkwardness from before to return with Soundwave, but to the contrary, any awkwardness between them had vanished almost completely.

They fell into a pattern. Most of their time was spent on the bridge, hard at work. Starscream had launched several successful campaigns against the Autobots. The Energon mines were yielding good results and the troops seemed happy. Meanwhile, Soundwave had established a vast network monitoring Earth’s communications. He reported anything of interest to Starscream, though lately there had been little to report.

Sometimes, in rare moments of idleness, Starscream would go stand behind the third in command, silently watching him work. It didn’t seem to bother Soundwave. In fact, his field was almost welcoming, greeting Starscream with something akin to warmth.

Starscream was getting better at reading Soundwave. It had been a challenge at first, to decipher what exactly the other mech was thinking. Their communication styles were so different. Starscream was all loud talk and dramatic gestures, while Soundwave relied much more on subtleties. However, as Starscream was quickly realizing, that didn’t mean that the intelligence officer had nothing to say. The smallest of gestures - the tilt of his head, the twitch of a servo - carried a world of meaning.

Soundwave, on the other hand, seemed to have reading Starscream down to an art.  _ Is there anything he’s not good at? _

Soundwave seemed to know exactly the right moments to show up with a cube of energon or a listening audial. Starscream wasn’t nearly as annoyed by this as he pretended to be, a fact which he suspected Soundwave was well aware of.

“I don’t need a sparkling sitter,” he sighed dramatically, but took the cube of energon from Soundwave’s extended servo anyways.

Soundwave made a small humming sound, something that sounded strangely like… a laugh? Starscream shot him a sideways glance, a perplexed smile gracing his features. Soundwave really did have a pleasant voice.

“You know, you should refuel as well. You’ve been working hard,” Stasrcream said. He offered a sip from his own cube, which Soundwave promptly refused.

“Soundwave, I mean it. That’s an order.” Though the intent behind his order was serious, Starscream kept his tone light. Soundwave’s resolve crumbled and he took a tiny sip from the Energon.

“There, see? That wasn’t so hard,” said Starscream.

They began refueling together after that. Sometimes Starscream used these moments as an opportunity to talk about his day or vent complaints about whatever was bothering him, but a lot of the time they simply sat in silence, enjoying each other’s company.

Whatever this was, Starscream could get used to it.

~

“How did you and Breakdown end up together?”

Knock Out paused his current task of cleaning his tools- Starscream was not quick to offer any compliments to their resident medic, but one thing he could say is that Knock Out always kept his medbay as immaculate as his own frame.

A small smile worked itself onto Knock Out’s features, his optics growing distant as he recalled memories from thousands of years ago.

“We were assigned to the same post, shortly after the start of the war. A small base on one of Cybertron’s moons. Before the moon was destroyed, of course.”

Knock Out continued, “He caught my eye almost immediately. I’ve always had a thing for larger mechs.” He added a wink after this, and Starscream rolled his optics.

“We started a tentative courtship. It was completely casual. Neither of us had really been in a serious relationship before. It didn’t help that we were both painfully shy about the whole thing.”

“I find that somewhat hard to believe,” said Starscream. Knock Out was the last mech he would describe as “shy.”

Knock Out laughed. “I know. There was just something about him, though. He was… special, and I was terrified of screwing things up.”

Starscream listened intently. This was a surprisingly genuine confession coming from Knock Out.

“We went on like that for a few centuries, dancing around ever discussing a future. The war didn’t help. It’s hard to discuss commitment when one of you might die at any moment. But truthfully, I think we were both just scared.”

“So, what changed?” pressed Starscream.

“Do you remember the Battle of Heliv?”

“Yes,” said Starscream. He remembered very well. It had been one of the most brutal battles of the war. Thousands of casualties on both sides, and everything on the moon had been completely razed to the ground by the time it was over.

“Our base was surrounded by enemy combatants. Most of our fighters had already been killed, and I was left to guard the medbay. Breakdown had been injured in one of the initial fights, and happened to be there with me. We sat there, huddled together for days, waiting for the final attack that would surely come at any moment. There’s something about being stuck in a small space, awaiting your inevitable death, that really makes you open up to someone.”

“We had shared a berth countless times, but this was the first time I felt truly  _ intimate _ with Breakdown. We talked to pass the time. We shared everything. Hopes, dreams, secrets, what our plans had been before the war and what we would do after if we ever survived it.”

“Through some impossible stroke of luck, a group of reinforcements showed up, and we lived. Once the battle was finally over, we had our conjunx endura ceremony, and that was it. I knew he was the mech I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.”

Starscream still couldn’t wrap his processor around it. “But how did you know you could trust him? What if he was just using you for his own gain?”

Knock Out looked utterly bewildered at this suggestion.

“Truthfully, that thought never even crossed my mind. I was too afraid of making a fool of myself to worry about Breakdown’s intentions. Besides,” he added, “Anyone who spends more than half an hour with Breakdown knows he’s not exactly prone to that kind of backstabbing. I don’t think he has a treacherous component in his frame.”

Knock Out’s tone left it fairly obvious that he found this trait completely adorable.

“Anyways,” he went on, “Isn’t that what love is? Learning to trust each other, even if it means risking being hurt?”

Starscream contemplated this. Could he even say he had ever been in love?

He’d loved Skywarp and Thundercracker, he supposed, but it was different than what Knock Out and Breakdown had. Seeker trines were formed at a very young age. He’d been with them so long that he had no reason to doubt them. Trusting them came naturally.

But risking opening up all of your most intimate secrets to someone, who could at any moment decide to use them against you? Starscream couldn’t say he had ever found another mech he would be willing to do that with.

He realized he’d been quiet for an awkwardly long time, and cleared his intake. “I didn’t realize you were such a sap,” he said.

“I have my moments,” Knock Out smiled.

~

“Commander Starscream. We’ve picked up life signals from an unknown source. It’s Cybertronian, but we’re unable to tell if it is Autobot or Decepticon.”

“Let me see,” he said, moving past the Vehicon who had reported this information to him.

Sure enough, the screen in front of him displayed a small signal. It seemed like only one mech, from the looks of things. What would a lone mech be doing on Earth? All of his Decepticons were accounted for. Perhaps another Autobot had crash landed and was attempting to make contact with Prime’s team?

“I’ll go investigate,” he decided. He had his doubts that this was anything important, but he’d rather go himself, just to make sure. Besides, it had been far too long since he had left the  _ Nemesis _ , and he was eager to stretch his wings a bit.

“Would you like for me to prepare a team to accompany you?” the Vehicon asked.

“No, that won’t be necessary. I doubt that a lone mech could provide that much trouble. Besides, I’ll have Soundwave with me.”

It was a tactical decision, of course. Soundwave’s scanners could track the mech’s position much quicker than Starscream’s could. His decision had nothing whatsoever to do with the fact that he was eager to spend more time with the other mech away from the crowded warship.

Soundwave, who was often difficult to drag away from his tasks, seemed surprisingly keen about the little outing as well. He joined Starscream on the bridge nearly immediately after being summoned, his scanners tuned and ready to go.

Without wasting any more time, the two of them stepped through the waiting ground bridge.

~

They emerged deep inside some sort of canyon. It was still daylight out, but their surroundings were dim, the sun straining to reach such a deep part of the canyon. Starscream adjusted his optics accordingly. Even if they were after just one mech, it was better to remain cautious.

Soundwave led them towards the mech’s position, which hadn’t moved much since the signal had first been discovered.

Soon, Starscream heard the sound of drilling, followed by a faint curse.

He turned a corner and caught sight of a green mech drilling into one of the walls of the canyon. The mech was too engaged in what he was doing to notice the two Decepticons.

A silent glance passed between Starscream and Soundwave, and they moved forward cautiously, until they were right behind the other mech. Starscream activated his blasters with a  _ click  _ and the other mech whirled around. Upon closer inspection, the mech’s frame seemed to be covered in miss-matched parts, parts that had clearly been taken from other bots.

“Well, well, well…” the mech said with a low chuckle, “I was wondering how long it would take before I attracted the attention of the bots on this pathetic planet. Though I’d have to say, I wasn’t expecting such an attractive welcoming committee”

“State your designation and business,” Starscream said firmly, ignoring the flirtatious comment.

“The name’s Lockdown,” the mech responded. He moved closer, not at all intimidated by the weapons aimed at his chassis.

“I’m looking for something, and as soon as I find it, I’ll be out of your way.”

“And what, pray tell, might that be?”

Lockdown began to pace a circle around Starscream, who kept his blasters trained rigidly on the other mech. Somewhere behind him, he felt Soundwave tense, ready to leap to his defense at any moment, if necessary.

“Have you ever heard of the Predacons?” Lockdown asked.

“I thought they were extinct,” Starscream said suspiciously.

“Oh, they are. But that doesn’t mean they didn’t leave anything behind. You see, Predacon bones are a powerful energy source. They’re very valuable, to the right buyer. And this planet just so happens to be a Predacon bone jackpot. After I find all of the relics, I’ll be off to sell them to the highest bidder.”

“This planet is under the control of the Decepticons,” Starscream snarled. “Every resource that exists here belongs to  _ me _ , so if you’re not allied with the Decepticons, I suggest you move along before I blast you out of existence.”

Lockdown laughed, unphased by the threats. “Oh, you’re cute,” he said, “But you see, I travelled a very long way to get here. I’m not leaving without what I came for, so I suppose that puts us at a standstill, doesn’t it?”

Starscream growled. He was tired of this mech’s games already. He took aim and fired, but in a flash Lockdown had vanished and reappeared behind him. He whirled around, disoriented.  _ How did he move so fast? _

It was only then that his attention was drawn to one of the many parts welded onto Lockdown’s arm. It was a device allowing the owner to teleport short distances. Its mismatched paintjob indicated that it clearly hadn’t belonged to Lockdown originally. Such upgrades were incredibly rare. In fact, Starscream had only ever met one mech who had such an ability.

“Wh- where did you get that?” he demanded.

“It’s a handy trick, isn’t it?” Lockdown gloated. “Got this baby from a Decepticon warrior. Funny enough, I was actually after someone else at the time, but this guy and his buddies got a little too interested in my business, and once I saw this neat little upgrade, well, I just couldn’t resist. I’ve got to hand it to him, he put up quite a fight,” the bounty hunter continued. “Surprised the hell out of me. Who knew you seekers were so scrappy?”

Starscream’s optics widened in shock.  _ Skywarp _ .

With a cry of rage, he charged at the bounty hunter, who just barely managed to teleport out of the way yet again.

“What did you do to him?!” Starscream demanded.

“So you knew this mech, did you?” Lockdown said, regaining his composure after the unexpected attack.

He smiled sadistically, like a cybercat circling its prey.

“I didn’t have any use for him aside from the upgrade, so once I’d had my fun, I offlined him,” he said nonchalantly. “I’m assuming you knew his Seeker buddy, too? If you’re holding out hope for him to be alive, don’t worry. They’re both dead.” He practically beamed with glee at being able to reveal this knowledge.

“Thundercracker…” Starscream murmured. “No!”

He charged forward again, blasters firing rapidly, and this time he managed to graze Lockdown before he was able to teleport out of range.

Starscream had lost all semblance of control. All he could think about was his own pure, unrestrained rage.

“I’ll fragging kill you!” he screamed.

“You can certainly try,” Lockdown teased. “Though based on your underwhelming performance so far, I doubt you’ll fare much better than your little buddies.”

He teleported again, and before Starscream could react, the bounty hunter had kicked his legs out from under him and pinned him to the ground.

“Those pretty little wings of yours will make a decent trophy, I think,” he smirked as he ran a clawed digit down Starscream’s face.

Before he could deal a killing blow, however, he was seized roughly from behind. A tentacle had wrapped itself around Lockdown’s neck, and a second one secured itself around his waist. He was torn away from Starscream and violently slammed into the ground, where Soundwave stood over him.

Starscream had been so caught up in his own rage, he had forgotten completely about Soundwave’s presence. Evidently, Lockdown had too, a mistake that was rapidly proving to be quite unfortunate for the bounty hunter.

Soundwave wrapped a tentacle around one of Lockdown’s ankles, lifting him up and slamming him back into the ground. The end of the appendage formed a blade, and he went in for another attack, but Lockdown managed to teleport out of the way just in time. However, Soundwave’s reflexes were faster, and he used his ground bridge manipulation to appear right in front of the other mech a few seconds after he teleported. Before Lockdown could react, Soundwave jammed his bladed tentacle into the bounty hunter’s middle.

Lockdown gasped in shock and stumbled backwards, already leaking copious amounts of energon from the wound.

He somehow managed to teleport away again before Soundwave could get a second stab, but the bounty hunter was clearly too exhausted to keep fighting. In a few quick bursts, he had retreated, and a few minutes later a small shuttle took off into Earth’s atmosphere as he made his escape.

Soundwave didn’t move to pursue Lockdown. His message had been clear enough, and it was unlikely that the bounty hunter would return to Earth any time soon.

The intelligence officer made his way over to Starscream, who was still on the ground, a volcano of emotions building up inside of him.

“They’re gone…” he said softly, then, again, louder this time. “THEY’RE GONE!” He pounded the ground beneath him with an angry fist.

“I knew it was a possibility. I’m not stupid. I knew as soon as Megatron decided to send them elsewhere that this could happen. Those two idiots could hardly take care of themselves without me…”

He was rambling, now, but Soundwave let him.

“And when I didn’t hear any news of them, I knew this could have happened. I knew it, but I hoped that maybe…”

He was too angry to speak, now. Angry at Lockdown for killing two of the only real friends he had ever had, angry at Megatron for separating the trine in the first place, angry at Skywarp and Thundercracker for having been defeated, and angry at himself for just barely avoiding the same fate.

He fought hard against the tears now forming in his optics. He would  _ not _ allow himself to show such weakness in front of Soundwave.

Starscream was suddenly shocked by a gentle touch between his shoulder blades. Soundwave had knelt next to him, and was rubbing a soothing circle into his back, much in the same way that Starscream had once done for him.

The tears finally worked their way free despite Starscream’s best attempts, leaving streaks of moisture down his face. Soundwave’s field contained no judgement, however. Instead, he slowly wrapped an appendage around Starscream’s waist, pulling him into a warm embrace.

Starscream lost track of how long they stayed like that. Instead, he focused on the sensations around him - Soundwave’s arms around his frame, the other mech’s soft intakes, and the gentle thrum of their two sparks, beating in harmony.

Eventually, the anger faded and the tears ceased. “Let’s go,” he said.

Soundwave opened up the ground bridge and the two of them stepped through it and back onto the bridge of the  _ Nemesis _ .

“The signal was nothing of interest,” Starscream reported cooly to one of the surrounding Vehicons. “Continue duties as assigned. I’ll be in my quarters for the rest of the day.”

He should probably recharge. His encounter with Lockdown had drained his energy, and his emotional outburst hadn’t helped either.

However, the idea of being alone was uncomfortable at the moment. Being closed up in his habsuite, alone with his own thoughts…

“Soundwave,” he said impulsively. Then added, a little slower, “Could you come with me for a moment?”

The other mech nodded silently and followed behind him. Once they were out of the bridge and away from prying optics, Starscream took Soundwave’s servo in his, leading him in the direction of Starscream’s habsuite.

“You don’t have to go with me, if you don’t want to,” he said, looking over his shoulder at Soundwave. “I know you have other duties to attend to.”

Soundwave gave no indication of protest, however, and let himself be led.

Soon, they reached Starscream’s quarters, and he brought Soundwave inside, locking the door behind them. This was the first time he’d ever had Soundwave in his quarters- or anyone, for that matter.

The other mech stood there awkwardly, a sentiment that Starscream echoed. What had he even intended to do when he got Soundwave back to his room, anyways?

“You can sit down, you know,” he finally said after a moment of silence.

Realizing too late that he should probably heed his own advice, Starscream moved to the berth, sinking down onto it and laying back.

“Here, you’re welcome to join me. You need to recharge too.”

Soundwave approached the berth cautiously, as if at any minute Starscream might change his mind.

The Seeker patted the empty spot on the berth insistently, and finally Soundwave lowered himself onto it, laying gently next to Starscream. His frame was warm, and Starscream instinctively moved a little closer.

Though he was tired, it took Starscream a long time to fall into recharge. Soundwave actually reached recharge before he did, and he spent a while listening to the sleeping mech’s gentle intakes until they lulled him into a comfortable stasis, comfortable in the embrace of Soundwave’s gentle field.

~

When Starscream finally awoke, Soundwave was absent from the berth. At first he thought with some disappointment that the other mech had left, but a quick sweep of the room revealed Soundwave standing off to one side, staring at Starscream’s few personal belongings.

Though Starscream was known to have a flare for the elaborate, his room was surprisingly under decorated. He hardly spent enough time there to justify it. Aside from the basic furniture, a small shelf on one wall displayed a few recognitions that he had earned at the Academy, long before the war. There were a few assorted war trophies as well.

“Nothing too personal, I’m afraid,” he said, moving off of the berth to stand next to Soundwave. “I’m not the most sentimental of mechs.”

His gaze moved to meet Soundwave’s. “But if there’s something you want to know, you could always just ask,” he said softly.

“Observation: rewarding in its own right,” Soundwave responded.

“Oh? And what have you observed?” Starscream asked.

“Starscream: not trusting of others. Difficult to open up.”

“You’re one to talk,” Starscream said.

Soundwave dipped his head in acquiescence.

“What else?” Starscream pressed on, moving closer.

“Starscream: displays a need of others’ approval. Paired with inability to trust, this makes any attempts at closeness… frustrating.”

Starscream reeled back a bit in surprise. He should have been angry, he supposed, at being read so thoroughly and accurately. But he didn’t feel angry at all.

“I trust you,” he said. He didn’t even know what prompted him to say it. He hadn’t even realized those words were true until they came out of his mouth, but as he searched himself, he realized that there was no lie in what he had just admitted.

“Trust: reciprocated,” Soundwave answered softly.

This didn’t make any  _ sense _ . Was this what Knock Out had meant when he said that love was trusting someone else? Did Starscream  _ love _ Soundwave? This was too much to process at once. He needed some sort of distraction.

Heat was radiating from Soundwave’s frame, and as Starscream looked him up and down, the perfect distraction occurred to him.

Before he could think twice about it, he leapt forward, shoved Soundwave against a nearby wall, and kissed him fiercely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I'm doing an okay job so far! I'm really enjoying writing this. Thanks to everyone who has commented <3 You guys are awesome!
> 
> Next up, things get steamy.


	5. Collide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Porn ahead, folks. Be prepared for some soft feels. These two have earned it.

Starscream pressed a kiss to the center of Soundwave’s visor and worked his way down, planting kisses along its seams until he got to the other mech’s neck. He gave a gentle nip to the sensitive cables there, and felt Soundwave tremble against him. Another bite, harder this time. Soundwave tilted his head back, baring his neck and allowing for better access.

Starscream continued like that, kissing and biting. Meanwhile, he slid a knee between Soundwave’s legs, which parted all too easily.

“You’ll tell me to stop?” he whispered into the other mech’s audial. Soundwave nodded. Starscream gave him another hard nip.

“Use your words,” he said, then repeated, firmer this time, “You’ll tell me to stop?”

“Affirmative,” said Soundwave, and his voice shaking just as much as his frame.

“So obedient,” Starscream purred. “I think that deserves a reward.”

He rubbed a servo against Soundwave’s interface panel, and after a few moments the panel slid open. He continued to place kisses against Soundwave’s cabling as his palm ground against the other mech’s bared array.

Finally, he pulled back, and Soundwave placed his servos on Starscream’s shoulders, as if trying to keep him there.

Starscream ran one of his own servos along an outstretched arm until he reached Soundwave’s servo and took it in his own. He tugged gently, guiding Soundwave to his berth and slowly lowering him down onto it.

Starscream didn’t join him yet. Instead, he stood over the other mech, admiring every dip and curve of his sleek frame.

“You may be the single most gorgeous mech I’ve ever met,” Starscream said with a content sigh. It was almost unfair.

Soundwave ducked his head in a sort of bashful gesture, which only served to make him even more adorable.

Starscream allowed a small smile to grace his features before kneeling over the other mech. He trailed kisses up Soundwave’s legs, starting at his ankles and working up to his thighs. Soundwave’s legs seemed to spread wider with each kiss, and by the time Starscream reached his interface panel, he had a magnificent view of the other mech’s valve.

He prodded the valve gently with his glossa, and Soundwave’s intake hitched in response.

Encouraged by the pleased reaction he’d gotten, Starscream continued to explore Soundwave’s valve, his glossa working its way into the different folds and lapping up the lubricant that was already forming. He ran his servos up Soundwave’s thighs as he did this, massaging gently.

He found Soundwave’s node, and started to suck, pausing occasionally to glance up and gauge Soundwave’s reactions. It had been a long time since he had eaten another mech’s valve, and he wanted to make sure that his partner was enjoying it. This seemed not to be a problem, however. The other mech’s head was thrown back and his vents hitched as Starscream placed more pressure on the sensitive node. 

After a few more minutes of well-placed licking and sucking, Starscream could feel a charge building. Soundwave was getting close.

Starscream paused in his activity and glanced up at Soundwave.

“Overload for me,” he said. It came out more like a question than a command, and he kicked himself internally.

It was still enough to send Soundwave over the edge, however, and his body shook as overload tore through him.

Starscream watched, fixated. He idly traced a digit along the rim of Soundwave’s valve, before moving his servo a bit higher, running it over Soundwave’s spike housing.

“Show me?” he asked, after Soundwave had recovered from his overload.

The panel guarding his spike slid aside, revealing a purple and silver spike with red biolights running up either side of it.

“Beautiful,” said Starscream. He wrapped a servo around the spike, tracing the ridges and curves.

He was so fixated that he nearly jumped at a sudden light touch to his hips. Soundwave’s tentacles prodded him gently on either side, caressing his hip plating. Starscream let out a little gasp.

He continued to rub Soundwave’s spike, but it was getting more difficult to focus as the gentle touches moved up his plating. Something brushed against his wings, sending a tingle up his spinal strut. The tips of Soundwave’s appendages were warm. Was he channeling heat into them somehow? He left a trace of warmth at every spot he touched, which only served to further stimulate the Seeker.

A tentacle wrapped gently around Starscream’s waist, spreading heat into his frame. He let out a soft moan.

The second tentacle had moved lower, and now rubbed against his interface panel. He considered trying to hold out, make Soundwave work for it, but between the sight of the other mech’s alluring spike and the intoxicating touches running up and down his frame, Starscream was all too eager, and he moved his panel aside.

Ever since Soundwave’s heat, Starscream had secretly fantasized about what those tentacles could do with a waiting valve. He had imagined Soundwave pushing an appendage in impossibly deep, stretching his valve wide and filling him until he was sure he could take no more.

Which is why the gentleness with which Soundwave touched him caught Starscream completely off guard. In his fantasy scenarios, the other mech’s touch had been firm, commanding. Here, however, he approached his partner with such tenderness. The ends of Soundwave’s appendages teased Starscream’s valve as he left light touches along the rim, tracing a few circles around it before moving deeper, caressing the folds.

Starscream spread his legs wider to give the other mech better access, and he thought he heard Soundwave’s intake stutter a bit as he got a better view of the Seeker’s valve.

The touches to his valve grew slightly firmer, just enough to start building a charge. Lubricant, which had been building even before Starscream opened his panel, now flowed freely. Primus, he  _ wanted  _ this.

The appendage inside of him rubbed against his node, and let out another moan, louder this time, only for it to turn into a soft noise of disappointment as the tentacle withdrew.

It joined the other one at Starscream’s hips, a pleasant heat still generating from both of them. Soundwave leaned forward slightly, reaching his servos out to take hold of Starscream’s upper body. Ever so gently, he began to lift, moving the Seeker into a position right over his spike.

Starscream was slowly lowered onto the waiting spike beneath him, and it slid into his valve with no resistance. Finally, when Soundwave’s spike was hilted completely inside of Starscream, the appendages around his waist loosened and were replaced by two servos on his hips.

Soundwave was completely still beneath him. Starscream looked up at the other mech's visor, which was fixed on him. Soundwave seemed to be … admiring him?

Soundwave's optics weren't even visible, but even just the feel of his lingering gaze did things to Starscream's spark. He couldn't remember anyone looking at him like that before.

His valve clenched around Soundwave's spike, bringing his processor back to the present. He wiggled his hips a little, but Soundwave remained still beneath him.

"M- move! Please." He whined desperately.

Soundwave obeyed, rocking his hips in a gentle rhythm. Starscream rested his servos against the other mech's chassis, moving his own hips in response. His movements were aided by Soundwave's servos, still resting on either hip. Slim digits flexed as Soundwave adjusted his grip. He continued to thrust, his spike rubbing pleasantly against the nodes in Starscream's valve.

Soundwave's tentacles wrapped around him in a soft embrace, joining in with the symphony of pleasing sensations already caused by Soundwave's servos and spike.

Starscream felt like he was being surrounded from all sides, but instead of feeling trapped, he felt comforted.

He wrapped his arms around Soundwave's shoulders in response, pulling his partner even closer until their foreheads touched.

Starscream let out a slight gasp as a particularly well timed thrust hit his node just right. He could feel his charge building, but he was in no hurry to reach overload. He was content to remain here, in his partner's warm embrace.

They stayed like that for a while, until the steadily building charge became too much to handle. Starscream panted against Soundwave, his breathy ex-vents fogging the other's visor. Soundwave leaned forward, as if he was going to whisper something into Starscream's audial. He summoned an audio clip from his data files.

"Overload for me."

It was a recording of Starscream's exact words from earlier.  _ That fragger! _

Starscream lost all train of thought as overload finally hit him. He moaned loudly, and the noise seemed to set off Soundwave, who joined him in overload. Warm fluids flooded into Starscream's valve, some of them escaping to run down his thighs and onto Soundwave's frame.

The two of them panted in unison, and after a few moments Starscream shakily lifted himself off of Soundwave's spike and collapsed onto the other mech's chassis.

"That was-"

_ Not at all what I was expecting. _

Their last intimate encounter had been rough and desperate, driven by the need of Soundwave's heat. Starscream supposed he had expected something similar this time, but he could not have foreseen the genuine affection and gentleness with which Soundwave treated him.

It was better than anything his fantasies could have conjured.

Soundwave let out a pleased hum, finishing Starscream's incomplete sentence.

Starscream rested his head on Soundwave's chest, still lost in thought.  _ What had he done to be deserving of such treatment? _

Up until now, any misgivings he had about their relationship centered around his hesitance to fully trust Soundwave. What if Soundwave was just using their relationship as an excuse to spy on him until Megatron got back? But now, there was no doubt in his processor that Soundwave was completely in love with him, and that terrified Starscream.

But the thing that terrified him even more? He loved Soundwave too.

He'd avoided such affections for so long. What was the point, when your friends could be cruelly taken from you at any moment like Skywarp and Thundercracker had been? His spark still ached at the thought of them. What if he lost Soundwave like that too?

His processor threatened to go down a pit of dark musings, but a touch to his shoulder pulled him back out. Soundwave rubbed his back soothingly, and Starscream let himself relax into the other's arms.

Forget about trying to logic his way through this. He was here, now, with a bot who loved him. He shuttered his optics and let that be enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think there will be one more chapter after this one. Thanks again to everyone who is keeping up with this story! It went in some ways that I didn't expect but I'm really happy with it. Special shout out to AsteroidMiyoko, who suggested the idea of embracing while interfacing. I hope I did it justice!


	6. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick epilogue to wrap things up! Part of me kind of feels like I should have just ended it at the last chapter tbh, but ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> Mood music for this chapter, and for the whole fic really (also inspiration for the title): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLBAHi4Jla4

“Before you ask, it was good.  _ Very _ good.”

Starscream smirked at Knock Out, who glanced up from the datapad he was holding, brows raised in surprise.

The crimson mech glanced back and forth between Starscream and Soundwave, who stood at his usual post on the other side of the command center, before letting out a small laugh.

“Got to be honest, Screamer, I didn’t think you had it in you.”

For once, Starscream had trouble thinking of a witty retort. Honestly, he was still a bit in awe over this whole thing happening. It still made no sense, but with each passing cycle he found himself caring less and less.

For the first time since the war started, he was something resembling  _ happy _ .

There were still bad days, of course. The loss of his trinemates still weighed heavy on his spark, and he doubted that the hurt would go away any time soon. Worse than the emptiness was the guilt. It kept him up at night.  _ What if I had insisted that they stay with me? What if I had been there to protect them? _

But then, right when his processor began to go too deep down that particular hole, Soundwave was always there to pull him back out. They recharged together now, and one of the many things Starscream had discovered about his partner was that Sounwave was an incredibly light sleeper. He supposed it was leftover instinct from Soundwave’s days in the arena, but whatever the reason, he always seemed to sense when something was wrong, and was instantly awake to wrap Starscream tightly in his tentacles and pull him against Soundwave’s warm chassis.  _ What would the rest of the Decepticon army say if they found out that their third in command is so  _ cuddly _ ? _

He cracked a small smile at the thought.

He was getting very good at reading Soundwave now. Sometimes, on rare occasions, it was Soundwave who awoke Starscream with tossing and frantic murmurs from some nightmare. He had to tread with caution. Soundwave was a lot less open about his pain that Starscream was, a fact that Starscream respected. On some nights, the former gladiator would retreat to another part of the ship to bury himself in work. With increasing frequency, though, he, too, let himself be held, Starscream placing gentle kisses along the back of his neck.

“Well, at any rate, you have my felicitations,” said Knock Out, pulling Starscream back to the present. “I always knew the two of you had something to offer each other.”

Starscream rolled his optics. Like slag he would let Knock Out take credit for his relationship.

He wasn’t as irritated as he let on, however. In fact, recently he found Knock Out much less irritating than usual. He didn’t know whether it was a change in the medic’s attitude or his own, but he wasn’t about to question it. It was nice to have an extra ally.

“By the way, Knock Out, this stays between us.”

“Of course,” said Knock Out, and there was sincerity in his voice.

Though Starscream himself was proud of his newfound relationship, there were certain drawbacks to having the entire  _ Nemesis _ know about it. Let alone what Megatron would say if he returned and found out that his second and third in command were seeing each other behind his back. But that was a problem for another day.

~

The door to his quarters had barely closed before Starscream pounced, eager servos running over every inch of Soundwave’s frame. It had been far too long since the two of them had gotten a moment alone together.

“Has anyone ever told you that you work too much?” he murmured.

“Starscream: not one to talk.”

“I suppose you’re right,” he sighed, wrapping his arms around Soundwave’s waist. He  _ had  _ been working a lot more than usual lately. It kept his mind away from less pleasant topics.

Soundwave pulled Starscream closer to him in response, wrapping his tentacles tight around the Seeker. The end of one of the data cables brushed Starscream’s face, lifting it gently until he was looking Soundwave in the visor. Starscream planted a soft kiss at the edge of Soundwave’s faceplate, before pulling back, lost in thought.

Soundwave let out a questioning hum.

“I- I want to see you.” Starscream blurted out.

He’d often wondered about what Soundwave’s face looked like, and he’d thought many times about asking to see it, but he’d been deterred each time. Soundwave wore a visor for a reason, he figured, and though he didn’t know what that reason was, Starscream was determined to respect it. Now, however, his more selfish side got the best of him. He longed to look Soundwave in the optics and plant kisses all over the other mech’s face.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to-” he went on, but was quieted by a soft touch to his cheek.

After a moment of hesitation, Soundwave retracted his visor. A pair of red optics gazed shyly at Starscream. The Seeker reached out, tracing a digit along a set of vertical scars that ran the length of Soundwave’s face.

He didn’t know what he was expecting, but he liked what he saw.

“Beautiful,” Starscream murmured.

Soundwave took Starscream’s servo in his, clutching it tightly as he leaned forward to place a soft kiss on Starscream’s forehead.

His lips just barely brushed Starscream, as if he was afraid of hurting the Seeker. It was, quite frankly, adorable, and Starscream wondered if Soundwave had ever kissed anyone before.  _ Well, there’s only one way to make sure. _

Starscream leaned forward and, in one swift movement, captured the other mech’s lips in his. Soundwave made a quiet noise of surprise before leaning into the kiss. Starscream’s free servo reached up behind Soundwave’s helm, the other one still clutching the third in command’s servo tightly.

After a few minutes, they finally pulled apart.

“I can’t believe you kept that hidden from me all this time,” Starscream chided teasingly.

Soundwave followed this up with another kiss, and Starscream melted into the touch.

“Let’s take this to the berth,” he murmured against Soundwave’s lips.

He was eager to explore more of that beautiful frame, though in reality the two of them would most likely end up simply holding each other, enjoying the other’s warm embrace until they had to go back to their duties.

Sure enough, as the two of them arranged themselves on the berth, all Starscream was able to do was gaze at Soundwave’s beautiful optics.

_ How did I get so lucky? _

It was a question he found himself asking every time the two of them were together.

A few months ago, he would have dismissed the notion of a relationship with Soundwave as ridiculous. He, like everyone else, had dismissed the intelligence officer as a cold drone.

_ They have no idea what they are missing out on _ . The idea both frustrated Starscream, but also excited him, to know that there was another side to Soundwave that was reserved for him alone.

“Mine,” he whispered out loud, as if to solidify that fact.

“Yours,” Soundwave echoed quietly.

Starscream rested his head on Soundwave’s chest, and a pair of warm arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer.

The other mech’s field radiated with warmth, trust, and a still new emotion that Starscream now recognized as  _ love _ .

For the first time, he was starting to believe himself worthy of it.

End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who took the time to read this, especially those who left comments and kudos!
> 
> Special shout out to AsteroidMiyoko, whose Soundscream RPs with me inspired me a lot, especially the last scene in this chapter. Also a big thank you to Inalia who looked over this last chapter for me!
> 
> I have a sequel idea but idk when it will happen. I super enjoyed writing this, so hopefully I can find inspiration and time to write more for these two soon.
> 
> Thanks again for reading, and take care!


End file.
